A conversation among a bunch of gals from my college over dinner brought this issue out. Why the hell do they have a "j" there when you are supposed to NOT pronounce it? If you want it to be called ha-le-peeno, please spell it Halapeno and not Jalapeno! We ended this piece of conversation with the common nod on how much we hate "suckers" who check you on pronunciations. Boys, do not speak French, when you can do with English. By the way, Hindi is the best in that respect. Of course, you know better than checking some gal on her pronunciations.
But seriously, lets take it from the top, languages were made to ease communications between human beings. Scripts were developed to make that communication portable and preservable. Why have we ended up with languages which make life more difficult then? I know we follow some rules for every language, but surely we could have done without the silent 'P's in psychology, pseudo and pneumonia! What purpose do they solve? In a corporate transformation exercise, we usually eliminate non-value adding elements which consume time, money or energy. Then why do we deal with them here day in and day out? Kill the 'P', people. It's time we change a language that doesn't go down well with our language-sensory-neurons and still has to be used since it is part of our everyday existence. It's not as if we can't change. The Americans call "she-dyool", (schedule) "ske-dyool"...and much more! They don't much care about the acceptance of that by the rest of the world, I guess. Good attitude. Helps them get there.
And, French! Oh my goodness, my friend was getting all red in the face with fury talking about how difficult that stuff is. Purpose? I am not very well read in this regard, but my friend seemed to think they really don't need to make everything sound like it can't be written down. Also, everything written down, will definitely have something more to be read out than just what is written! Somebody has definitely goofed up somewhere (:P, I'm surely getting hate mails from all French afficionados now). Either you write what you pronounce, or you pronounce what you write. You can't have it complicated both ways, sire!
I was asked a tricky question by a classmate when we were trying hard to interpret a declamation speech, sitting in the last row of the school auditorium back in grade 8. I still make people solve the silly thing just to make a point. She wrote down "ghoti" on a piece of paper and asked me what can be a totally unlikely yet possible pronunciation for that word. I never waste brain power on futile questions. Presuming this was one, I quickly blurted "gho-tee". The conversation- I remember only very little of it - would have gone on these lines:
Her: "What if I say, it can be called 'fish'?"
But seriously, lets take it from the top, languages were made to ease communications between human beings. Scripts were developed to make that communication portable and preservable. Why have we ended up with languages which make life more difficult then? I know we follow some rules for every language, but surely we could have done without the silent 'P's in psychology, pseudo and pneumonia! What purpose do they solve? In a corporate transformation exercise, we usually eliminate non-value adding elements which consume time, money or energy. Then why do we deal with them here day in and day out? Kill the 'P', people. It's time we change a language that doesn't go down well with our language-sensory-neurons and still has to be used since it is part of our everyday existence. It's not as if we can't change. The Americans call "she-dyool", (schedule) "ske-dyool"...and much more! They don't much care about the acceptance of that by the rest of the world, I guess. Good attitude. Helps them get there.
And, French! Oh my goodness, my friend was getting all red in the face with fury talking about how difficult that stuff is. Purpose? I am not very well read in this regard, but my friend seemed to think they really don't need to make everything sound like it can't be written down. Also, everything written down, will definitely have something more to be read out than just what is written! Somebody has definitely goofed up somewhere (:P, I'm surely getting hate mails from all French afficionados now). Either you write what you pronounce, or you pronounce what you write. You can't have it complicated both ways, sire!
I was asked a tricky question by a classmate when we were trying hard to interpret a declamation speech, sitting in the last row of the school auditorium back in grade 8. I still make people solve the silly thing just to make a point. She wrote down "ghoti" on a piece of paper and asked me what can be a totally unlikely yet possible pronunciation for that word. I never waste brain power on futile questions. Presuming this was one, I quickly blurted "gho-tee". The conversation- I remember only very little of it - would have gone on these lines:
Her: "What if I say, it can be called 'fish'?"
I: "Whoa, but how?"
Her: "GHOTI: F for gh as in enouGH, I for o as in wOmen, SH for ti as in demoliTIon"
I: "hmm...shhh! The prefect is watching us."
I: (being the sucker I am for such things) "Arre, that thing was enough, women, demolition. Naa?"
Her: "GHOTI: F for gh as in enouGH, I for o as in wOmen, SH for ti as in demoliTIon"
I: "hmm...shhh! The prefect is watching us."
I: (being the sucker I am for such things) "Arre, that thing was enough, women, demolition. Naa?"
Her: "yeah, that's why they say English is an impure language."
I: *Didn't register at all what she said later*
I must have thought who cares 'who' exactly says English is an impure language so long as I remember the answer to that puzzle, which is enough-women-demolition! I am such a nerd. (Can I tell myself, pun intended?). So, men and all others out there, remember enough-women-demolition AND stop it now! (Yippee...gotcha there!). All I mean is, change the way we speak/write and lets concoct some real Indian English now. See, with every 6th person on earth being an Indian, we're sure to get full support on this. If nothing works, we can put in a plan to organise a SMS voting global contest for the "Indian English usage" popularity and forward the money generated for Senator Clinton's presidential campaign....They'll agree for the money and we're sure to win all the votes in favour of the Indian English. How...? Look, if we can vote 'Taj Mahal' the first (in popularity) of the new wonders in the world, then we Indians sure have learnt the art of flooding the telecom networks if it comes to saving the pride of our nation!
I: *Didn't register at all what she said later*
I must have thought who cares 'who' exactly says English is an impure language so long as I remember the answer to that puzzle, which is enough-women-demolition! I am such a nerd. (Can I tell myself, pun intended?). So, men and all others out there, remember enough-women-demolition AND stop it now! (Yippee...gotcha there!). All I mean is, change the way we speak/write and lets concoct some real Indian English now. See, with every 6th person on earth being an Indian, we're sure to get full support on this. If nothing works, we can put in a plan to organise a SMS voting global contest for the "Indian English usage" popularity and forward the money generated for Senator Clinton's presidential campaign....They'll agree for the money and we're sure to win all the votes in favour of the Indian English. How...? Look, if we can vote 'Taj Mahal' the first (in popularity) of the new wonders in the world, then we Indians sure have learnt the art of flooding the telecom networks if it comes to saving the pride of our nation!
1 comments:
A few pertinent comments from me, for a change!
- The "ghoti" anecdote is actually Bernard Shaw's. It's one I've heard often. The version I have heard had "enough", "women", and "motion", though I can see why you'd prefer your version! "Enough women motion" is hardly a feminist slogan :P
- Though a bit of a French afficionado, I'll pardon you because I liked the post. So instead of hate mails, I'm sending appreciatory comments! Sigh :(
- If you want to be really really nitpicky, the most different, though perhaps the most accurate, pronounciation is "Halapenyo"
- Judging someone on pronounciation: Great point, but has it occured to you that care taken to pronounce a language properly is symbolic of your interest in, and affection for, that language? If you liked someone, would you pronounce his name incorrectly?
- The point that "you can't have it both way" about the French pronounciation is very perspicaious. I'm not sure I've grasped it completely yet, though!
Overall, I really liked this post. It's my favourite post on your blog (among those posts I have read).
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